(A Lot of) Help Wanted

While searching Craigslist for freelance work the other day, I came across an extremely peculiar job offer. Instead of actually finding a career like this, I could just stay at home and get paid to take surveys. Here is what the hopeful employer was looking for in a new hire:

Our small business is looking for a strong individual to head our writing department. This motivated and extremely educated team player will need a winning attitude and the dedication to lead a team in order to thrive and persevere within our company.

This person must be skilled in all facets of copywriting. Traditional print, video, radio, and direct mail experience are vital to the success of our company. Said individual must have a masterful understanding of all facets related to SEO and web content as well as some understanding of technical writing pertaining to the fields of engineering and janitorial supply chain management.

Basic web and graphic design experience is also a must for the successful integration of our marketing department. Adobe Illustrator, Photoshop, InDesign, Dreamweaver, Flash, After Effects, Fireworks, and Acrobat skill are absolutely mandatory along with a keen sense of basic animation principles.

Some basic coding in the languages of C++, Java Script, Visual Basic, Joomla, PHP, and jQuery will be expected along with a solid grasp of HTML5 and CSS. User experience and graphic interface integration skills are going to be expected on the first day of the job.

Prior administrative experience in the fields of medical coding, architectural maintenance, and basic paralegal research are a huge plus for this position.

We are only able to pay $11 an hour for your services and you will be expected to work late into the evening. If you have an active social life, family, or other dependents this job might not be for you. Please be able to find a health insurance company because we are unable to provide benefits at this time.

If interested in the position, please send a three page cover letter, CV, online portfolio, writing samples, and a SASE to our address which you can find by conducting a Google search.

Thank You

-Joe CEO

There might be a good reason that this economy is in shambles and everyone is struggling to find a job. Employers aren’t looking for people to work for them, they would rather hire robots programmed to memorize all facets of marketing, coding, writing, and design to work for them instead of real people with raw creativity and talent.


One Response to “(A Lot of) Help Wanted”

  1. GrafikDetail-- -- -- October 20th, 2011 11:34 pm

    Wow was this really a job post? I’m not surprise Craigslist attracts some of the craziest & most uninformed employers I’ve ever seen.

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